2016, It Was the Best of Times...

It was the worst of times.  In 2016, an (insert every imaginable derogatory adjective here)  (then, insert all possible disparaging nouns, including the really nasty ones here) tried to steal my smile.  Fortune, however, smiled back on us--Suzanne and I had many wonderful encounters with the healing beauty of nature, as well as the expansive enrichment of the arts, and we have the photographic evidence to prove it:

Awe-inspiring design in downtown Los Angeles, the Disney Concert Hall, featuring heavenly music by Ludwig van, and Gustav Mahler;  this lucky son experienced joy tenfold with Dear ‘ol Dad.

Ewoldsen Trail, Julia Pfeiffer Burns State Park.  Gosh, the complexity!

"Concert Cake”  

As it says at the top:  Louise M. Davies Symphony Hall, where the orchestra played my all time favorite soundtrack, “Vertigo,” by the great Bernard Hermann

Desert Fairy awakens, Upper Covington Flats, Joshua Tree National Park, in what felt like a Disney movie set

Dawn 2, Twin Tanks Cathedral, Joshua Tree, a sublime and otherworldly Spring Break

Now that we live in upside down, Bizarro-World, it isn’t so surprising that I’ve traded my delicious S2000 for a Chevy Volt, the ultimate I’m-A-Good-Boy car!   After six fulfilling years of unmitigated fun, the stellar little Honda was doing serious damage to my hip-joint, while this plug-in (like a Tesla) hybrid (like a Prius) has been silently/smoothly delivering big juicy torque (YUM!), and redeeming my deep personal guilt for that fire-breathing behemoth in the background, which burns 100 gallons/hour!  😆

When the plane went down for maintenance for a few days, I raced over to Yosemite, where I had NEVER BEFORE backpacked!  After hiking up among huge crowds, on the trail just left of Yosemite Falls, I reached the rim, to the right of that peak...

with zero crowds, and one of the greatest views on the planet.   As the sun set, strong winds blew in, for an exciting and fitful night’s sleep.

We’ve been flying up to Fall River Mills for many years, but in all my explorations, I had never before paid the $5 to enter Burney Falls State Park.  As you see, I got my money’s worth!

Our third summer journey to the hot rocks of Utah.  Upper Muley Twist trail, Capitol Reef National Park, a 10 mile loop, overnight backpack in 105º solitude.

Nature’s angle...

and the inverse.  Upper Calf Creek Falls, Grand Staircase Escalante National Monument

OMZ, the White Rim, Canyonlands National Park, (in fact, amazingly, this is part of our CAMPSITE, the only campsite in White Crack Campground!)

Enter the vortex, Observation Trail, Zion National Park

All lined up in Fruita, Utah, Capitol Reef National Park

Tahoe surprises us with yet another new trail, Maggie’s Peaks, Desolation Wilderness.  

Emerald Bay, Lake Tahoe

Ed and Susan Murphy’s annual Pumpkin Carving Party, a non-oceanic gathering of the Fogbathers (the group where surf transforms old men into little boys)

Behold, the quivering Hell-Boxes of FlightSafety, which David Deutsch calls:  “virtual reality generators.” “Virtual reality is not just a technology in which computers simulate the behavior of physical environments.  The fact that virtual reality is possible is an important fact about the fabric of reality.  It is the basis not only of computation, but of human imagination and external experience, science and mathematics, art and fiction.”  Alternatively known by some as a “pain in the ass!"

Speaking of virtual reality, a photographic depiction of shadowy reflections including Suzanne and yours truly, at The Sea Ranch

A slightly larger album with full-size versions:

https://goo.gl/photos/1x2bLWEYJtWA4MMS6

Never before have I experienced so much fear and anger.  The election of this person is by far the most colossal joke of our lifetime.  I believe his words and actions have already caused a significant increase in suffering all over the planet.  This is wrong, and it WILL NOT STAND.  Loathe as I am to speak ill of anyone, I’ll let a few of our best Republican leaders do the job, most of these quotes are from the esteemed (by someone, I assume) “National Review":   

"Trump is a jackass, a race-baiting, xenophobic, religious bigot,” Lindsay Graham

“Donald Trump is a phony, a fraud,” Mitt Romney

“Listen, Donald Trump is a serial philanderer, and he boasts about it,”  Ted Cruz

"the textbook definition of a racist comment," Paul Ryan

"rooted in ignorance, prejudice, fear and isolationism,” Henry M. Paulson Jr.

“Donald Trump is a madman who must be stopped,”  Bobby Jindal  

“he is a moral degenerate,”  Peter Wehner, evangelical Christian commentator who served in last three Republican administrations

“When you’ve got a guy favorably quoting Mussolini, I don’t care what party you’re in, I’m not voting for that guy,”   Ken Cuccinelli, Senate Conservatives Fund  

The man has demonstrated an emotional immaturity bordering on personality disorder, and it ought to disqualify him from being a mayor, to say nothing of a commander-in-chief.” Mona Charen, Ethics and Public Policy Center

"According to conventional caricature, conservatives are selfish, greedy, materialistic, bullying, misogynistic, angry, and intolerant. They are, we’re told, privileged and pampered elitists who revel in the advantages of inherited wealth while displaying only cruel contempt for the less fortunate and the less powerful.  Trump is the living, breathing, bellowing personification of all the nasty characteristics Democrats routinely ascribe to Republicans. And then there’s the uncomfortable, unavoidable issue of racism.” Michael Medved

 "Trump is an unbalanced force. He is the politicized American id. He would be, unquestionably, the worst thing to happen to the American common culture in my lifetime"  John Podhoretz 

“Character Matters”  Republicans

 “Trump is a scum-sucking pig!”  Marlon Brando as Rio, “One Eyed Jacks"

It was sad to see how quickly the thin veil of CIVILization could be ripped asunder.  Let us all do our very best to resist these selfish, immoral tendencies.  There were many people in 1930’s Germany that opposed the Nazis, but they didn’t fight hard enough.  Our democracy, at minimum, is at risk, we all bear some responsibility for allowing this toxic contamination, and I believe we must all, personally, work towards defecating this poison from our system.  Call and write your senators and representatives, sign petitions, march, do everything you can to resist, over and over.  When they said, “never again,” this is what they meant.  We will win.

 

Love mas

2016 Movies (Wowie, zowie, what a great year for film)

1. La La Land

2. The Jungle Book

3. Room

4. Zootopia 

5. Deadpool

6. Captain Fantastic

7. The Revenant

8. Manchester By the Sea

9. Sing Street

10. Kubo & the Two Strings

11. The Martian

12. Everybody Wants Some

13. Sausage Party

14. Dr. Strange

15. Sully

16. Hunt For the Wilderpeople

17. Love and Friendship

18. Hell or High Water

Steve Jobs

Joy
Diary of a Teenage Girl
Stranger Things
Fantastic Beasts
American Honey
The Lobster
Lion
Rogue One
Fastball
The Edge of Seventeen


Pre 2016

1. Shakespeare In Love (This breaks my usual rule, I’ve actually seen it before, unlike any other films on these lists, but it was easily the most intense, enjoyable movie I experienced this year).

2. Lego Movie

3. Valley Uprising

4. Alive Inside

5. Interstellar

6. Road

Amy
Bridge of Spies
Spotlight
What Happened Miss Simone
The Danish Girl
Embrace of the Serpent
Anomolisa
Elizabeth
The Experimenter
Inside Llewyn Davis
The Glass Key
Mustang
Beyond the Edge
Love, Actually
St. Vincent
Dior & I
I’ll Be Me
Seymour, An Introduction
Unbranded
What We Do In the Shadows

Recommended Non-Fiction

Shift Into Freedom, Loch Kelly (I am reading this awesome book on Dzogchen Buddhism for the third time, studying it every day.  It is the best description I’ve seen so far of the mind/world relationship, with a solid foundation of current neuroscience and philosophy)

The Way of Zen, Alan Watts

The Ego Tunnel, Thomas Metzinger

Desert Solitaire, Edward Abbey

Recommended Fiction

Water for Elephants, Sara Gruen

Pale Fire, Vladimir Nabokov

Euphoria, Lily King

Real Change Inspired By an Idea, and, a Big Fat pain in the BUTT!

The idea:  one little person changing to an electric vehicle can “make a difference.”  The pain in the butt:  quite literally, a giant pain in my ASS!



Way back in 2010, we saw a powerful documentary, “Who Killed the Electric Car,” which prompted me to ditch my fuel-inefficient, but otherwise excellent Mazda RX-8.  Hybrids were the solution, man, until I discovered that I could dramatically improve my mileage AND have the car of my dreams, the all-conquering Honda S2000!

It has been a love affair forged by Venus and Min, (god of the road), the 100% perfect car for Mark Alan Swanson.  Peaceful and sedate around town, deceptively impersonating a mild-mannered “cute little Miata,” aka Dr. Jekyl.  Then, out on remote, back mountain roads, I dig deep, literally pedal-to-the-metal, the tachometer climbs above 6,000 RPM, and HOLY FRIKBALLS! it’s MR. HYDE! in all his vicious, howling glory.  The S2K really GETS ME THERE.  Not simply moving my body from place to place, it excites and thrills.  It grips the road like a bulldog, with mind-reading, intuitive steering, balanced, predictable handling, and sock-me-in-the-jaw stop-right-NOW brakes. 

Yum, just ogle those svelte, sexy lines!  Cute AND Fierce, like a cat.  I know, you get it, I love the S2K, but, sadly, for the last few years any trip in my heavenly transport lasting more than an hour has induced excruciating hip pain, so off I went to the orthopedist, hoping surgery could keep us together.  Dagburnit!  My frikkin' hip-joint is the picture of health, and western medicine has no answer for my freaky actual problem: "trochanteric bursitis," other than injecting pain killers.  I couldn't help noticing the ABSENCE of pain while sitting bolt upright in the King Air or Suzanne's MDX, and the doctor and physical therapist agreed that my sweet car's sitting angle was unquestionably the cause.  PAIN PILED ON TOP OF MORE PAIN!  Could I really break up with the greatest car on the planet?  Well, having already sacrificed the second best pleasure in life, (getting drunk), perhaps this is my butt's way of saying "it's time to LET GO of your WORST addiction, Mr. Hedonism!"  (Heh heh, that's a joke, driving isn't number one, even for me).  But, of course, I made the easy changes first, ending my 6-month long twice-a-week sprint-training at the track, as well as giving up my favorite Yoga pose, virasana, which I’ve used in my daily sitting meditation for years.



So, I need an ultra-dependable car with bolt upright seats and stellar gas-mileage. Suddenly, for the first time in my life, I was shopping for an American car, incredibly, TWO!  A plug-in hybrid is undoubtedly, the ultimate “I'm-a-good-boy-car,” and the two best bolt-upright plug-in hybrids in my price range were the Ford Fusion Energi, and the Chevrolet Volt.  The Energi is supposedly the better handling car, so I picked it. Veracom Ford in San Mateo was asking $18,600 for a 2013 with 45,000 miles. I offered $16,500, they said $18,300, I said $17,500, they said $18,150, I said make it an even $18,000 and we've got a deal.  They wouldn't come down and I wouldn't go up, so I walked!  For less than 1%!   (Clearly irrational behavior, from BOTH parties—interacting with car dealers has always made me a little crazy).



Then, Suzanne and I left for Spring Break, Joshua Tree and Palm Springs.  It was really fun, and I practically forgot all about cars.

Joshua Tree National Park
This was only our fourth night backpacking together, EVER!  You can just barely make out the little solo bug tent for her, with my sleeping bag laying out in the open air right next to it:

Joshua Tree and Palm Springs brought their usual solace, pleasure and joy.  On the last night in Palm Springs, I opened my iPad to check Car Gurus to see if anything had changed in the local Ford Fusion Energi market, and WHOA!  there were 3 very reasonably priced options from a dealer I hadn’t previously encountered, “Carlypso.”  Turns out, they’re an Uber-like start-up company that acts as a broker, finding you the car you want, servicing and prepping it, all for $1,000-2,000 less than all the regular dealers, but you have to contract to buy it, with only photos and the CarFax report.  Once you receive the car, you have 7 days to confirm it is OK.  They found me a beautiful 2013 Energi with 30,000 miles for $18,500, still under factory warranty, and I said “go.”  At this point, I’d done massive amounts of research, including endless hours poring over the most recent Consumer Reports Automobile edition, but I’d never studied one particular page, “The Worst of the Worst.”  Now that I was under contract, for some reason, I glanced at that page, and was HORRIFIED to see the 2013 Ford Fusion right there in frikkin’ black and white!  OMZ, I knew about the Energi’s on-board electronics problems, but I couldn’t believe it qualified as a “worst of the worst.”  Luckily, Carlypso’s bid at the auction didn’t win, and I extricated myself.



Back at the drawing board I re-examined the Chevrolet Volt.  Even though the car magazine guys fall all over themselves praising the styling of the Ford Fusion, I actually prefer the Volt, even though I CONSTANTLY tell myself that I don’t care about the looks.  And though the Fusion handles slightly better than the Volt, COME ON, these cars are frikkin’ ROCKING CHAIRS compared to the S2000, small handling differences like this are almost meaningless.  As I dug deeper and deeper into my mind’s preferences, I saw staring back at me the real reason that I was being drawn inexorably into the Volt’s binding spell:  $5,000.  The average cash price for all the Volts I was now looking at were roughly $15,000 compared to the average $20,000 for the 2014 Energi, and I was once again reminded of the pain and suffering I’d experienced with the Porsche Boxster in Switzerland—paying over $3,000 to rent a car for one week, AND being constantly responsible for a very pricey car scared me to death.  The more I did the math with these plug-in hybrids, the more attracted I was to driving a car that was 25% less valuable.  How bizarre, and even FUNNY to learn this late in life that I’m super reluctant to drive an expensive car.  And I DO care about color and styling, and I’m a “Chevrolet-man,” not a “Ford-man.”  Ha ha!  I’m joshing around, but this is truly a hot-bed of self-discovery.



Last week I bought a 2013 Chevrolet Volt, 38,500 miles, $15,500, which just happens to be $1,000 LESS than I bought my S2000 for FIVE YEARS AGO!  Selling the S2000 will probably recoup 3/4 of the money I paid for it in 2010.  In other words, for a surprisingly small amount of $, I'll get a “new" car, and if we get solar panels, I’LL BE HARVESTING THE SUN’S POWER TO MOVE MY BODY AROUND IN SPACE/TIME!  YAHOOOOO!!!!  Is that a compelling idea, OR WHAT?



I will be trading the performance game for the "hyper-miling" game.  Driving the Volt includes an actual video game, a type of technological biofeedback to teach one how best to brake and accelerate in order to maximize efficiency and stretch each battery charge.



Brake or accelerate too hard, and that green ball with the leaves turns YELLOW, ouch!

Last week I drove to and from work 3 times, and didn’t burn one drop of gasoline!

 To give up “sport driving,” after cherishing it my entire life feels like a small death, so what, exactly, is my butt trying to tell me?  As I alluded to above, I WISH it was telling me to transcend selfish pleasures, but more likely, it is simply SCARED.  Afraid I’ll be taking it along with me to the scene of the accident, as I have in the past.  The high G-loads I feel from hard acceleration, cornering and braking spell FUN to my body, but I’m acutely aware of the risks, to my car, my life and most importantly, to OTHERS!  How many times have I told myself:  "I've had enough beers for one lifetime," and now I'm trying to tell myself the same thing about the joy of driving fast. It may or may not be true, but I really love this idea:  letting go of selfish pleasures, and ultimately, letting go of the self.  Best of all, I'm genuinely excited about saving $, reducing greenhouse gases, and most importantly, looking like someone who cares!  Now I guess we'll see if she really wants a good boy or not.  I never really wanted to be bad,  I was just tortured by a serious case of speed lust, and that really and truly brought out the beast in me. Luckily, I also adore driving calmly, even meditatively, so I'll still get to relish that.



Amazingly, as I approach my final good-bye to the S2000, I feel quite comfortable with the recognition that I’ve really DONE the whole S2K experience, 5 days at the track, and millions of moments pushing it and myself to the limits, out on the “screamingly intense” edge.  On the other side of that coin, this five years has coincided with my increased focus on mindfulness, so, for years now, without the distraction of the radio, I’ve drenched myself in consciously aware appreciation of driving with the top down, out in the open air, soaking up all the sensory inputs, hot sunshine, cold wind, bird calls, and flower scents, all while simultaneously noticing the smooth throttle response, firm crisp “snick snick” of the delicious manual transmission, symbiotic feedback from the sensitive neutral steering, and the ever present “dance with the road.”  Some mighty nice "here and nows!"  Since I was a young child, driving has bewitched me, and in all probability I will never have a car I love this much.  I am so frikkin’ lucky and grateful, and I’m even ready for the change.  As long as I’m still alive, these small deaths invariably include small re-births.

 
Love mas

p.s. I realize I’ve been reluctant to climb on to this bus;  kudos and thanks to our brave, inspirational friends who ventured first into the untested realm of electrics and hybrids, especially Adrian and Amber, who tread this very same path, the Chevrolet Volt AND solar panels, YEARS AGO!

© Mark Swanson 2016

Kayo Denham was a Saint

December, 2015

I, along with several billion other humans on this planet, struggle and work at practicing a spiritual tradition.  Kayo, my father-in-law, was different from me, he was “a natural,” unaffiliated with any religion or spiritual path, and yet, all those positive attributes that I try so hard to remember each day, he gracefully and naturally embodied.  He made it look easy, and I believe it really WAS easy for him.  In the entirety of my experience, Kayo was the most gentle, the most generous, the most kind, and the most selfless person.  He was living, breathing loving-kindness.  One of the most profound blessings of my life has been seeing and feeling Kayo’s warm, bright, happy example.  

 Thank you Kayo, I will always love you!

A Lovely Transition

Last week we traveled to Astoria, Oregon to witness, share and celebrate the beautiful wedding of our young friends Kendall and Wade.

Their small town is filled with historical and geographical significance, right on the mouth of the MIGHTY Columbia River:

Atop the Astoria Column


A dramatic port with many relics of a nautical past:

Like most of the Northwest, Astoria is blessed with an abundance of something we Californians had forgotten, a little thing called "precipitation":

Holy Zeus, GREEN GRASS!

The gorgeous Bride, escorted by the proud Father

There were, of course,  many heart-warming moments;  Joal's excellent story-telling skills made the Father's Toast one of my favorites.

Wade and Kendall dive into Deborah's fabulous PALEO wedding cake.


Suzanne and I are deeply grateful to have shared this life-changing event with you Kendall!  Thanks to Joal and Deborah for all
 the sweet hospitality.  How wonderful to meet young Mesha, and visit with Joph after, what, DECADES? 

Love mas

Why I Love the Wild/Why I Quit Drinking 2013

It came to my attention, way back in High School composition class, that certain subjects commanded almost universal fascination.  Sex and violence, of course, (oh baby, I had a FIELD-DAY with the Inquisition and the Ku Klux Klan!), and then, speed, danger and adventure.  Somewhere along the line, I got the foolish idea that certain activities that I was involved in, carried a similar intrinsic interest, like aviation, cars, treehouses, beautiful mountains, and, of course SQUIRRELS!

Oh, you are so CUTE!  You sweet, little, tiny CUDDLY squirrels;  excitedly scampering all up and down the tree, and I'm talking, LITERALLY up and down 100 FEET, in a TRICE!  REPEATEDLY!  Those LUCKIES!   I couldn't see them down on the forest floor, but it was hilarious HEARING them dash about down there amongst the duff and detritus.

When we last left our hero, in his "victory" hammock, it was tarnished by pain, fear and frustration, but THIS, the third time, was a CHARM.  At many points this project was nearly abandoned, but finally, the difficulties were outweighed by a glorious, beautiful, deep pool of contentment, AHHHHH.  Now, I can celebrate VICTORY, and wanted to share it with you.




As I rode into the woods for these wonderful two days up the tree, I encountered my good friends Lynn and Steve, and mentioned that the tree-project originated because it was so difficult to fit backpacking (where I REALLY wanted to be, the Sierra) into my work schedule.  While riding away from them, it hit like a thunderclap:  "what the heck am I SAYING, our weekend trip (in the backup plane, with it's OWN maintenance issues)  just cancelled, and I know, FOR SURE, that I don't have to fly for at least 6 days!"  Back home, I researched and found this astounding place:

Crystal Lakes, Sequoia National Park

Golden Hour

note my tent on this side of the small Crystal lake

the larger Crystal Lake with the color

Dam!

On my first morning, the only other person at the lakes departed, so I stayed another night, and on the second day, climbed that shoulder on the left.

In 20 minutes, I rose 800' to 11,400'.  

 Steep and terrifying, "I'm NOT a rock-climber!" kept echoing through my brain.

Scary, but I prevailed.  If it looks like a knife-edge, it WAS.  I was clinging to this sharp cliff for dear life.

the view left

Ample proof, once again why I yearn so for the mountains.  Here are a few more shots:

https://picasaweb.google.com/107161978117607741609/CrystalLakes

Why I quit drinking

I was a drug and alcohol virgin entering college at UCSC in 1975, but quickly developed the skills and motivation to abuse both.  In 1989, Suzanne entered my world, and I moderated my drinking, but remained strangely comfortable with the epithet "alcoholic."

Most of you don't know what it is like for an ADDICT, and I'm GLAD for you!  Even though I've experienced few serious consequences from my drinking addiction over the years, it upsets me to be a slave to the compulsive behavior.  On numerous occasions, I've imposed arbitrary limits, like just two-a-day, but eventually, I'd hear squeaking protests from my tiny conscience, when I inevitably couldn't toe the line.  Worse still, I'd quietly sneak a drink from a bottle in the pantry, knowing that Suzanne disapproved.  Argh!  Mostly, I wasn't a heavy drinker, but it was always out of my control, it FELT like I couldn't even take the IDEA of stopping seriously.  Then, after many embattled conversations with Zeus, I planned to stop at the beginning of 2013.  But, we decided to go to Europe, and I couldn't imagine not drinking German beer and Italian wine, (a good example of the problem), so I waited.  Returning home, with destiny approaching, I became scared, and (this seems so silly to me now) even SAD.  In fact, it felt like I was pre-grieving for an old super-close friend, which I WAS, in reality, planning to kill off.  On a little higher plane, I've once again become enthusiastic about Buddhism, including the concept that suffering is caused by desire. I realized that I've been intellectually linking my desire for alcohol to ALL desire.  In order to take "letting go" of desire seriously, I believed that I needed to start by letting go of drinking.*  Now that I've been off for a month, there have been a few moments here and there when it felt strange or awkward not to have a drink, but 95% of the time it has been incredibly EASY and WONDERFUL!  

As some friends have pointed out, there were no delirium tremens when I stopped, so I guess it wasn't technically an "acute withdrawal," but unquestionably, I was, and am an alcoholic.  I hope I can keep this preferable alcohol-free lifestyle going.

ON THE OTHER HAND, I really DID love the connoisseur element of tasting, (and preferring), particular beers and wines, (bad timing!  the last couple years have brought the explosion of superb craft beer production, especially in the US).  I will miss that part.  Also, much of the time, the physical sensation of being intoxicated, was very pleasant, and I often enjoyed it, A LOT, (all due respect to Buddha), in what FELT like a mindful way.  I will also miss that part.  The whole idea of Bacchanalian, ecstatic, celebratory freedom and release, STILL strikes me as a positive thing, but, don't get me wrong, on average, drinking is unquestionably, for an addict like me, a net NEGATIVE.

Here is a short list of positives that I've noticed, since the scales fell from my eyes:

1. Significantly better sleep

2. No more DUI bogey man

3. I can take more ibuprofen, with less concern for stomach/intestine damage

4. No hangovers

5. Dinner actually TASTES better, because I'm more conscious

6. Saving mucho dinero

7. Less hiding/lying

8. The end of monkey shit on my back

9. A sense of power and control over my own life (possibly an illusion)

and one BIG disadvantage:  I no longer get to pretend that I'm just like:

1. Alan Watts

2. Hemmingway

3. Hunter S. Thompson

*A brief treatise on Desire

I'm not officially a Buddhist, but I practice many of Buddha's non-"metaphysical" teachings.  Buddha's first Noble Truth is that life is "suffering" or dissatisfaction.  The second Truth is that dissatisfaction is caused by "desire," attachment, greed or grasping.  It isn't so much the feeling of desire, per se, that causes suffering, but the inevitable CONSEQUENCES of desire that make us suffer.  Here's a little quote from my favorite book, "Mindfulness in Plain English,"

You can’t ever get everything you want. It is impossible. Luckily, there is another option. You can learn to control your mind, to step outside of the endless cycle of desire and aversion. You can learn not to want what you want, to recognize desires but not be controlled by them. This does not mean that you lie down on the road and invite everybody to walk all over you. It means that you continue to live a very normal-looking life, but live from a whole new viewpoint. You do the things that a person must do, but you are free from that obsessive, compulsive drivenness of your own desires.   You want something, but you don’t need to chase after it. You fear something, but you don’t need to stand there quaking in your boots.

Gunaratana, Bhante (2011-09-06). Mindfulness in Plain English: 20th Anniversary Edition (p. 13). Perseus Books Group. Kindle Edition. 

And a very short quote:  "Buddha's second truth, to whatever degree we desire, to that degree we suffer."  And last, but not least, "is it all right to have the desire to achieve enlightenment?  Yes, this is a very good desire--called "the desire to be desireless.""

I know that desire seems as inescapable as death and taxes, and admittedly most of my life I have held Buddhism at arm's length because this part struck me as inconceivable.  Giving up desire just sounds (superficially) like giving up LIFE!  As I see it, the goal of my meditation practice is looking with bare awareness at the way my mind functions, and interacts with the world, over and over, until eventually, I am experiencing all the pains, fears, desires and pleasures that I'm currently experiencing, but I'm detached, just WATCHING, conscious of what is happening, but not caught up by it.  Perhaps, simply because I've read about it so many times now, enlightenment/liberation is starting to sound possible.  As I've told you previously, I am a baby at this, but I have had a few shimmery glimpses of what it might be like.

Thank you very much for your love and support!

Love,

mas

p.s. My promise to purchase "Mindfulness in Plain English" in paperback or Kindle for anyone and everyone still stands.  Say the word, and it is YOURS.  Please just ask, I'm NOT KIDDING!

© Mark Swanson 2013

Boring Holes Through Space/Time, (Western U.S./Summer 2015)

In June, we had our annual flight up to Wenatchee, then Leavenworth, where I backpacked up to Colchuck Lake, featuring Dragontail Peak.  That's Asgard pass just to the left, the entrance to the "Upper Enchantments," (I only made it to the "Lower Enchantments," boo hoo!).

Holy Catballs, it still shocks me to camp so close to spectacular peaks.

YeeGawds, nice, eh?!

Food art for my Brother-in-law Brian's Birthday.

A short weekend work trip down to Orange County, and the Boss allowed Suzanne to go to!  We stayed at the well-positioned Bay View Marriott on the upper Newport Back Bay.

On one of our numerous trips to the Pacific Northwest, a fabulous view of Mt. St. Helens and Mt. Rainier.

Camping at Charbonneau Park on the Snake River, WA.

Having failed once before due to a nasty snow storm, this summer, with somewhat better weather, I made another heroic attempt of Mt. McLoughlin, a "lofty" 9, 495'.

Hooray!  Victory is MINE!

Otherworldly environs of Mt. McLoughlin, OR.

Emerald Bay, South Lake Tahoe

Thanks to Jen for this deliciously calm respite from the storm of life, on the lagoon in magical Stinson Beach

While visiting Stinson Beach, over the years, I've often gazed longingly up to the hills above, and FINALLY, this time we went and discovered the killer West Ridgecrest Blvd.  Can't wait to take the S2K!

Of course, the Mighty MDX is a good car also...

Suzanne absolutely delights in the water-sports at the lagoon, and her delight delights ME!

Once again, this year I was able to attend three of the "Open Rehearsals" of the Cabrillo Festival of Contemporary Music,  catching almost all 15 of the pieces they performed in concert. That's We Wei on the left, about to run through the orchestra's first try at "The Color Yellow," a concerto featuring the Chinese Mouth Organ!  (an instrument I've never even heard of).  Like every single rehearsal I've ever heard Marin Alsop conduct, it was indescribably wonderful--you gotta go next year!

For years I've yearned to clean our backyard and garage, so right around 3:30, one afternoon a couple weeks back, we called a professional hauler, and then worked our cabooses off, hauling it all out to the driveway before his arrival at 7:00 P.M. that evening.  Just like that, poof!  Swanson Selectric Service (as well as a lot of other stuff) was virtually dissolved.

YAHOO!!! POOL PARTY!  Lynn and Steve, and her parents Carol and Vic are the BEST FRIKKIN' HOSTS!

Happy Revelers

After mimicking marine mammals the previous day, we kayaked and canoed out from Moss Landing, to live among them for awhile.

40 years ago, I arrived at UCSC in a station wagon with my family, who dropped me off, with a few possessions, and I began a new life.  It took me 13 years to finish my Undergraduate College career, and in that time I built a tree-house, and a "burrow," an underground room.  From 1980-2013, for 33 years, I repaired IBM typewriters, all over campus.  Last week, I rode my bicycle throughout the campus, exploring new buildings, and reliving memories in all the old spots.

The students haven't returned from summer break, but many of my old friends were still around.

I found a nice oak tree, right on the edge of the great meadow below McHenry Library, and spent the night, much as I had many times over the past 40 years.  Who needs a dorm, when there are a million spots to sleep?

So much fauna amidst the flora--I had encounters with a mature buck, (who bounded right over me in the woods), what looked like a wolf-husky mix, running after the buck, several wild turkeys, and many, many deer.  Zeus Bless, I love Santa Cruz!